’)Lesser of Two Evils
By: Unwelcome Perspective
With mid-term elections only a few months away, you’re bound to be hearing this phrase a lot, “I don’t really like either of the two candidates, so I’m just going to vote for the lesser of two evils.” The lesser of two evils? Did they really just say that? This phenomenon is without a doubt the dumbest phrase uttered during elections, and hearing someone say it should provoke you to check this person’s wrist for an RFID chip, and at the very least, never discuss politics with them again. I like to respond to this person by treating them like a 5 yr old, and I restrict any future political discussions to a preference test between the colors of red and blue.
Here’s the real question we need to ask these people. We live in America, so why do we have to vote for evil, period? Why is evil the only option on the ballot? What’s the point of democracy if it means rule by the people, represented by evil. The reason evil is the only option is because somewhere in our country’s history, the political elite decided that the masses are holistically retarded, and all voting issues should be limited to a color-coded choice between red and blue.
Now I know a lot of us, including myself, are pretty dumb, but two choices? When has two choices ever been good enough for America. We’ve got 45 different types of deodorant, an entire aisle of shampoo, 33 kinds of spaghetti sauce, five different major religions, 30 different churches just of Christianity alone, over 100 different categories of hardcore porn, yet in an area of life as controversial as politics, we only get two choices. Where the fuck are the entrepreneurs and marketing geniuses in this product line? Clearly there is no money to be made in creating a third party. The research and development budget for introducing new parties is a figure that translated by accountants means “No one fucking cares.”
What’s the solution? Like I said, I’m pretty dumb, so I can only give a grassroots suggestion: cease all contact with people who say “lesser of two evils” even if it requires a lawyer. And if you decide you want to vote for a Ron Paul or a Ralph Nader, or anyone outside the political mainstream, tell everyone that you are voting for the best of three candidates, two of which are probably evil.